eh. life goes on.

the idea that life can go on in my absence takes a lot of getting used to.
last summer was like this too. i disappear for a weekend and parties happen. people acquire stories, photos are put on facebook, and i get to feel irrationally jealous about it. i guess it's because i miss my friends terribly when they're gone, but nobody seems to notice when i'm not around. they tell me they miss me, they say they're there if i need to talk before i come back; and then when i need them most they're nowhere to be found.
and this weekend, it was okay, because i know enough people in weird time zones that i found someone awake and willing to lie to me for half an hour so i could stop panicking. but that was just sheer dumb luck; and i wonder what will happen the next time if there's absolutely no one around.
one day i'll have someone who'll sit by the phone waiting for me to call. or at least that's what i keep telling myself.